Anger and Resentment: The Myth of Power Session 5 covers material in Chapter 5 Session Rationale: Sessions 5 and 6 For many prisoners, uncontrolled anger and reactive aggression are chronic problems that undermine their ability to get along in the world and often are at the root of their involvement in the criminal justice system. There is no right way to resolve resentment. This is a creative exercise that I have found helpful for myself and with clients to explore what needs to change, what needs to stay the same, and what we need to guard against. 2. Internally, we go through emotional changes in which negative feelings and thoughts are let go of – we decide to put our hurt, anger, and resentment in the past. Select a target: a critical mother, a controlling boyfriend, a cutthroat colleague. Each tactic on our list works different muscles and may not work for everyone. Check your motives and expectations. Letting go of resentment is a marathon, not a sprint. Reconciliation (repairing or returning to a relationship). I am willing to change." And make sure that you allow yourself enough uninterrupted time so that you don't feel rushed. Define it. Telling a friend, a therapist or a family member how you feel can be incredibly liberating. ready to let it go is to do the "Mirror Exercise" by Louise Hay where you look yourself in the eye in a mirror and say as many times as you can, "I am willing to let this go. Letting go of anger, resentment, shame, and other emotions associated with an injustice, even though they are reasonable feelings. Sometimes these resentments may feel like they offer security from future harm. For some, letting go of resentment may be just seeing a person once or twice a year at a family gathering, for another, it may be daily contact. To do this, it’s most powerful to speak it out loud. 1. The practice of forgiveness will help you let go of these painful experiences and offer freedom to the mind and heart. 8 Letting Go of Resentment Exercises 1. The next time you are angry, conflicted or feel the need to “talk things out”, take a moment to liberate yourself from overwhelm and get into a more balanced state of mind. Notice your internal response and go from there. Directive – Think about what you need to keep or hold on to in your life and what you need to let go of or keep out of your life. … Write a Letter, Read It Aloud, Then Burn it 2. A good rule of thumb for this exercise is trying it every day for at least fourteen days. Interpersonal forgiveness, while not necessarily required, can involve trying to put ourselves in the wrongdoer’s shoes and … Set Your Intention to Release the Resentment The purpose of releasing resentments is to increase your energy and to feel better. But with forgiveness, you can free up space in the heart to allow love and care to take root. You can’t heal if you don’t know what is broken. You probably form expectations about what they’ll do for you in return. Treating the offender with compassion, even though they are not entitled to it. Forgiveness does not mean forgetting or condoning the wrongdoing, granting legal mercy, or reconciling a relationship. Managing your emotions and letting go is essential to sustain momentum and happiness in your life and consistently move towards success. Whether you forgive and let go your resentment or not, it’s important to be open-minded. Try each, hang on to what helps and let go of the rest. Staircase to Your Inner Sanctuary 3. 12 Steps to Letting Go . #3 -- Surrender Your Resentments If you can stomach the thought of letting go … For example, think about when people ask you to do things for them. Forgiveness is a process where someone who has been wronged chooses to let go of their resentment, and treat the wrongdoer with compassion. Pinpointing the source of resentment is step one of letting it go. The best way to eliminate resentment is not to set yourself up for it. Strategies to Let Resentments Go. Before doing any of these exercises, it's a good idea to set the intention to be willing to let go of all negativity. Perhaps you’ve tried to discuss the grievance with no results.